Control

Titus understands that when you point a black something at the tv it does something. He knows what the something is, but he doesn't know what it's called. Occasionally he will get a hold of the tv remote and push buttons. However, when he pushes the right buttons he turns on the tv and gets a static station. I don't know why, maybe white noise freaks him out, maybe he knows he did something he should not do. Whatever the reason when Titus changes the channel he runs to me like the house is on fire. He knows that whatever he just did wasn't suppose to happen.

Titus could handle these things in different ways. He could choose to keep changing channels, he could choose to try and hide the fact he turned the channel, or he could choose to come to me and say mommy I made a mistake can you help me fix it.

Which got me thinking. When I have made a mistake, when I have sinned what do I do? Do I keeping sinning? Do I try and hide my sin or do I run the remote back to God and confess my sin? Scripture says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

Which leads me to more thinking. If I confess my sins and I know he's faithful and just, why do I take so long to confess my sins? Honestly, sometimes I like my pet sins and I'm not ready to give them up. Which is silly because I know that giving up my pet sins brings me to a much richer, more full filling place, yet by keeping my pet sin I deny this very thing I want. I heard a quote once that sums up my next reason and biggest reason I hesitate to confess my sin. I once heard someone on tv say, Jesus Christ will forgive my sins, but my mom isn't going to understand. The second biggest reason I'm hesitant to confess my sin is because I am more likely to get understanding from a non-believer than I am a christian. I am more likely to have a unbeliever come along side me and love me where I am, than a believer. A believer is more likely to judge me, condemn me, not walk beside me encouraging me towards freedom in Christ. I have a deep desire to share my sin, my struggles but I also want to be loved through the struggle while being encouraged to obey and submit to God.

Yet to find freedom, to confess my sins before God I need to risk not being understood in my sin. Yet I also need to ground myself in the truths scripture gives me that "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come"! I need to cling to the heart knowledge that when I confess my sin, God has purified me from all unrighteousness through Jesus Christ.

Father God, Thank you for forgiving me when I come to you. I thank you that you see me as a new creation and the old is gone. Thank you that when I run to you, your arms are always open. Help me to walk in the truth of forgiveness that you promise. In Jesus name, Amen.