I'm on a journey of learning how to be the best help meet for my husband. Meeting his needs so that he is at his best to serve the God who created him for greatness. A God who wants to send him out into a world to minister and serve others, pointing them to Christ. A world who wants to steal my mans manliness and his worth as a man.
What is my role as Mark's help meet? As I read through Created to be his helpmeet. I am learning that there are three types of men. The command man, the visionary man, and the steadfast man. Mrs. Pearl says that men are usually a little bit of each of these, they are also usually dominant in one of these areas. Mark is hands down the visionary man! Mark is creative and inventive. He loves the thrill of the hunt or in his case the thrill of the perfect photograph. He's in search of the perfect natural lighting, seeing in nature what I myself am too impatient to even care to see. Yet, when Mark says, "Robin look!", I am always amazed at what he has me stop and look at and also amazed at how much I miss because of my fly-by personality.
My role as Mark's wife is to first and foremost pray and lift him up to the Lord. Interceding for him to the LORD who created him. Praying for the Holy Spirits direction in his life and that Mark would be suble and open to the direction the LORD wants him to go. As Mark's wife my job is to be open to the directions God wants him to go. Trusting in the Lord with all my heart and leaning on the promise that my path will be made straight when I do trust. Mark has a vision and passion to one day have a ministry out of his photography. He wants to use his talent with a camera to direct and point people to Christ. What you may ask is my role in this. As of right now, my role is to pray for God's timing in the matter, while praying God will give Mark patience and peace in the desire of his heart. Not going before or after God, but waiting on God's perfect timing. My role is to tighten our grocery bill if the case arises that we need to pinch pennies even tighter. My role is to encourage Mark and give my imput IF and I do say IF Mark asks for it. I need to remember I am NOT Mark's guide or the one to tell him what to do.
Let me say this, I am finding that when I get on board with my man's passions, when I am encouraging him instead of fighting him on everything and not knit picking just because I feel out of control or insecure. Mark is more often open to the insight I may have on the circumstance or situation. He is open and suble and ready to hear what I have to say AND is also usually willing to acknowledge that I might be right. If however, I fight against what the LORD is doing in my man or asking him to do, I am destroying whatever God wants my man to do for his glory. I am deflatting the man God has given instructions to fulfill. Imagine if Noah's wife had said honey you are off your rocker and pitched a fit, could she have deflated Noah and detered him from a most important situation. What about Sari, Abrahams wife, if she had flat out refused to go anywhere because she wanted to be near her family and would go nowhere. We can see the big picture of a flood coming and of a promised land, but Sari and Noah's wife didn't have an end result picture to follow. All they had was their husband and the LORD their God that they trusted. They went on blind faith and were honored for it and their husbands were able to fulfill what God asked them to do.
Something I noticed about each of these women is that they trusted God and had an intimate relationship with HIM. Perhaps it was not their husbands they trusted so much as it was YAHWEH they were trusting and following. When God asks us to do something he also brings peace along in the circumstance, but I have to allow the peace by being willing to submit to Mark and choose joy and choose to be thankful in the circumstance. Even praying and being thankful in advance for the amazing works he will do through my husband.
I am usually harder on myself than Mark is and I often find myself apologizing to him for telling him what to do, not meeting a need I knew he had and didn't do anything about. I apologize and he looks at me and says I didn't think that needed apologizing for, but he also says grants forgiveness. I am trying to be patient with myself and give myself room to error and blow it. I am after all still human, I need to give myself room and time to pratice being joyful always and thankful at all times. My husband can see my effort and is being patient with me. God is patient with me, so I also need to be patient with myself. Being patient with mself does not give me permission to slack off and not do my help meet role. That's not at all what I am saying. I am giving myself permission to seek God's forgiveness, Mark's forgiveness, forgive myself and the continue to press on and fullfill my help meet role in Mark's life.
He who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus! Be patient but press on!
note: Since I have begun to pursue meeting Mark's needs joyfully without complaining and actively being Mark's help meet, he has taken the trash out twice without me having to do it or having to ask him too!
Note to Mark: Thanks babe for taking the trash out, I sinerely appreciate it! But, I also know that you have a lot on your plate and when you aren't able to take the trash out, I am more than happy to do it! I love you babe!