The beauty of God's word is that it holds answers for every question I have. Maybe not billboard size, but if God wants me to understand something or wants to teach me something it is there for me in his word! This is true of my time in the word lately.
I shared early I struggle with jealousy. I struggle being joyful with someone else. A true struggle. I am also digging into what it means to love when we are all imperfect. This means we are going to need to confront sin at times in one anothers lives. If you are not use to this than it's quite a sting to the system. If you are use to it, than it is still quite a sting to the system. I am doing a Beth Moore bible study and in it was scripture leading us to the place were we can complain and bring our complaints. We can bring our complaints to our friend Jesus! I had not thought of this for some reason. I have been wondering, if I am in the middle of trying to having a good attitude, so as to glorify the Lord. What do I do with my feelings, I know feelings are just that feelings, I know they are not truth. Yet as much as I want to wish them away they don't poof disappear. My attitude doesn't poof change and make me like my twins more. BUT...I can talk with Jesus! I can tell him all my griefs. When I'm heavy laden I can take it to him in prayer! DUH!!! I can complain to Jesus. I can tell him my frustrations, I can tell him what I hate. In the confessing to him my heart changes. Something gets released to him when I reveal to him my ugliness, my thoughts I want no one else to hear or even imagine I'm thinking! My frustrations, my bad attitude I can't change has somewhere to go! There is a garbage dump that returns joy and gladness for your nasty slimy ugly self! Yet it's the most beautiful garbage drop off site I've ever seen! There is no murkiness, the baggage and slim dissapear. His lake were he throws my burdens and sins must be VERY VERY deep!!!!
Yes Jesus knows my every weakness, when I'm heavy laden, and cannot bear another minute. When my twins are drawing every ounce of patience I have, when Maddie has peed on the floor for the 10th time during potty training, when I don't want to jump with joy at anothers blessing...take it to the Lord in prayer!!! He loves me! He LOVES me! A foul disgusting mess and he LOVES me!!!!
Thank you Jesus!
Awesome stuff! I remember when I was losing my temper with the kids all the time. The thought struck me that the fruits of the spirit are fruits. They are not actions that I pretend. When I am filled with patience, I am truly patient, not just pretending to be patient. And I realized I couldn't do that on my own. So I started to really pray for patience in my life-real patience. Holy Spirit given patience. And eventually, slowly and without even realizing it, I started to truly 'feel' more patient with the kids. It was pretty exciting!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad that born-again, messed up sinful human beings don't have to live this life on their own. I'd never make it!
Keep sharing. I love reading what you write. *hugs*